(via neosatsuma)
small human with a faulty meatbody and a perpetual spoon defecit
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The tone difference in foraging guides between native plants and invasive plants is literally so funny to read
Terry imma need examples
Foraging guide entry on native plants: Make sure you only take a small amount from a well-established patch. Leave some for the wildlife, and yourself next year! Please get involved in land restoration programs to protect this plant for the future :)
Foraging guide entry for Japanese Knotweed: RIP RIP TEAR KILL REND DESTROY EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT E V I S C E R A T E EAT EAT EAT EAT
It’s similar for wildlife.
Brochure about native fish: Remember to only fish for approved species at the appropriate time of year and only with a license and correct fishing gear. These rules exist to make sure we don’t damage local fish populations and these amazing animals can be around for future generations!
Brochure about invasive lionfish: You can kill them with a SPEAR, you can kill them with a HOOK, you can kill them with your BARE HANDS (but watch out for the spines)…did we mention the flesh of this spicy devil fish is DELICIOUS?? Do your part for the environment and CONSUME THE PROBLEMSRIC LION OF THE SEA.
Feed them to SHARKS. You can make a SHARK your FRIEND with this ONE WEIRD TRICK.
(via couhnida)
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“Why I Work Out - @notmichelleelman
I’ve been working out consistently since I was 19 years old, that’s a whole decade of working out. And someone this week said to me “Well it’s clearly not working because you’ve not lost any weight.” That’s not why I work out. I started at 19 because I was bedridden in a hospital bed and I had spent my whole life focusing on what my body couldn’t do. And for the first time I realized just how much it could do. I had the urge to run for the first time probably because I wanted to get out of there so badly and so I did and that’s where I started. Oh and by the way, the last decade has worked. I can carry a handbag for the first time without chronic pain. I did my first sit up last year after three years of hard work, and most of all my body has allowed me to do everything I enjoy, from squash to paddle boarding. It’s time we see exercise as so much more than aesthetic results, because more than anything I want people to understand I don’t do it because I hate my appearance. I do it because I find it fun, and that’s the best reason to work out.”
(via livingmeatloaf)
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not so friendly reminder that it is not “gay wrath month”. it is DISABILITY PRIDE MONTH. we already get forgotten, ignored and silenced, so just don’t do that shit.
(via hussyknee)
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Source ~ @/lizmac927
[Video ID: Recording of green hills and trees with a clear blue sky. Text on the top of the video reads “Ahh… The sounds of the Welsh Hills.”
Man 1: *in the distance, shouting desperately to his sheepdog* “No, Ted! Fucking hell. Away! Away! Ted no!”
Man 2: *behind the camera. Laughing.*
Woman: *behind camera* “What’s he trying to get? He’s herding up the sheep.”
Man 1: “Get here! Here, here, here!”
Woman: “Come on, Ted.”
Man 1: *seen in the distance on a 4-wheeler* “No!!”
End ID]
(via futzingbarton)
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siphonophores will never not freak me out. stop doing that its SCARY but also please don’t ever stop doing that you ethereal marine cryptid
the red shape is a person of average height. the green line is one of these freaks. btw
(via livingmeatloaf)
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I challenged my cousin mash up Brittany Spears’ “Toxic” and “O Come All Ye Faithful” and she did it in about 20 seconds
this is beautiful
(via bunjywunjy)
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Today in Dracula: Local lawyer lives out every lawyer’s fantasy of whacking their worst client with a shovel.
(via livingmeatloaf)
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(via @itsbenedict)
me explaining to the other trainers that apricorns are unknown outside of Johto because of deliberate suppression by the Silph and Devon corporations to present artificial pokeballs as the only means of capturing pokemon and establish regional monopolies after they eliminate renewable sources
eternalfarnham replied to your post
you’re in the pocket of Big Ball, I see
there’s no pocket for me to BE in, there’s no LOBBYING involved, there’s no SUPPRESSION campaign because you don’t need one! traditional methods suppress themselves when you make modern pokéballs available. you might as well start accusing AT&T of deliberately suppressing the noble traditional art form of the goddamn semaphore.
not to mention OP demonstrates a total lack of understanding of the market realities of the pokéball industry- Silph and Devon are not monopolies, if they weren’t in constant competition their magic monster domination spheres wouldn’t cost two bucks a pop. the ball spec is a public standard, and Bill Masaki’s storage system based on that standard is an open-source project. they’re only the two largest players because they’re able to leverage economies of scale. you still get smaller operations like the Laverre City Poké Ball Factory, with better regional supply chains and local brand recognition, making room for themselves in the market.
sm FUCKING h at y’all granola-crunching conspiracy theorists. you probably also believe Super Potions cause autism.
Ok, but it is a shame that artisanal balls are basically off the market now. Like, you have to ride the monorail and hike through a half dozen routes just to find someone willing to sell you a Fast Ball. Believe me, when your boss at the power plant needs five Electrodes by Tuesday you are not going to want to make the trip to Alola; you’re going to head on down to the Mart and get some Ultra Balls, which will do the trick but aren’t well tailored to the job.
I’m with you that modern catching techniques are better, not to mention more humane, but there genuinely is a loss from more niche balls becoming harder to find. Maybe someday the long slowpoketail of consumer demand will be met, but I wouldn’t hold my breath for that Shellder.
look y’all are missing the point. mass production of silph balls crowding out traditional apricorn craftsmanship is, if anything, more a side effect of the real problem: that capture artifacts are too easy to get your hands on these days. $2 basic balls are a problem. before modern ball tech you had to go to an artisan, yes, but part of their job was to care about who had the power to recruit pokémon from the wild, as a backstop against another Knight of Veilstone coming along. there was a time when you’d never lay a hand on a ball yourself until it was clear you respected pokémon, whether tame or in the wild. but now, a “pokémon journey” is open to practically every teenager, even if they’ve got not interest in treating their team with trust and love.
the worldwide rise in the last century of organized crime and apocalyptic cults who use pokémon as their muscle is a direct result of capture artifacts becoming a mass produced market commodity rather than a mechanism for preserving the sacred trust between humans and the wilderness. it’s a miracle that the powder keg hasn’t already gone off by now.
Oh that is rank historical revisionism - what, do you think artisans’ definitions of “respect” were constructed in a vacuum? We already had rhetoric as far back as the warring states period in Ransei about how only the soldierly classes, overwhelmingly descendants of nobility and taught from birth, had the intangible qualities necessary to “bond” with Pokémon. And when we start seeing apricorn balls develop in Johto, which borders Kanto - Kanto, where we know there’s been extensive cultural cross-contamination with Auroran and Dragnoran expeditions - surprise, suddenly only a small population has the intangible qualities necessary to use them, too.
That notion was, and remains, a tool to limit general access to Pokémon in the interest of maintaining class disparities. I mean, have we already forgotten the Aether Foundation’s pseudo-conservationist nonsense? Their attempt to manipulate natural resources and establish a power base in Alola, while they were modernizing and taking their place on the world stage, was founded on this exact rhetoric of “rescuing” Pokémon from local disenfranchised populations, as if taking Pokémon away from places like Po Town would improve things instead of increasing competition between trainers and decreasing safety.
Do you want more disillusioned kids joining gangs? Because that’s how you get Teams!
Artisanal balls and anyone who supports them are tools of the aristocracy to suppress the common folk. In the days when a ball could only be made by hand by an expert, only the wealthiest could afford pokemon, and as a result anyone not born into the “elites” was forced to be subservient to their “betters” for protection.
The release of the $2 pokeball meant that the balance of power shifted to the common citizens. If any child can wield the power of a god, the military and the government and the wealthiest businessmen have no power over them.
More than that, instead of power being determined by the wealth to acquire pokemon, power comes exclusively from the dedication, effort, and empathy required to train them to high levels and to maintain their loyalty. If a person simply buys their pokemon, then those pokemon will either stay at low levels forever, or refuse to obey the human because there is no respect between them; the most powerful people in the world are those who caught a critter at level 2-5 and then devoted their life to raising it into a world power.
And as a beautiful side benefit of this, standard of living has increased across the board. Since every household has at least one minor pokemon in the family and there are increasing numbers of professional, working pokemon joining cities and other civilized areas and working to improve them, every aspect of economy and industry has been enhanced by their supernatural capabilities. Electricity is generated cleanly and in abundance for everybody. Pollution is cleaned up almost completely and instantly. The production of farms, mines, and workshops is multiplied, even as safety standards improve. Yes, every few years another potential apocalypse comes about and needs to be prevented by a couple of brave teenagers, but outside of those incidents the world is damn close to utopia.
…that was all fascinating to read and I would like to see more like it, please
for instance; what the hell is in lemonade that makes it a more powerful healing alternative to regular potions
Opium
See, unlike in the real world, the Pokémon world has yet to ban cocaine in drinks.
this website is INCREDIBLE
(via crystallllines)
Theme: Linear by Peter Vidani